Ask Zoe!

Dear Readers,
Please feel free to ask your question and I’ll make sure to answer you in my newsletter “Ask Zoe” column, or on my blog “Ask Zoe” column.
Thank you and I look forward to hearing from you!

Can EFT (Emotional Freedom Techniques) Make Me Hate French Fries?

Jerri wrote, “Can EFT make me hate french fries?”

That’s an interesting and complex question. Regarding the french fries: if you love french fries so much that you can’t stop yourself from eating them, even though you feel they’re not good for you, EFT can help with that. The way we do EFT Tapping with what’s basically an addiction, is two-fold. The first level is this: whenever you have an urge to eat french fries, tap on “Even though I really really want those french fries. I want that hot crispy taste, I deeply and completely accept myself.” (to find out more about tapping, contact me, and I’ll send you directions). When you do one or more rounds of EFT Tapping on each thing that’s, right now, really tempting you (the specific smell of fries, maybe; the way they look, the way it feels to chew them, etc), you’ll probably notice that it takes away the craving in the moment. Often, though, this level doesn’t keep the craving away. If you stay with this level, you’d need to tap every time you have the craving. Eventually, it’ll stop the craving, but this way isn’t the most efficient.

The second level has to do with how the french fry craving started. Cravings have two sides to them–one side is anxiety and the other is relief from anxiety. With EFT, we go into what specific feelings fries evoke for you (a certain kind of comfort, sense of belonging, peace, etc) and when you had those feelings (family picnics, sitting around the dinner table as a kid, watching TV with friends, etc). We then tap on those. Often, cravings have to do with a state of mind we’re trying to achieve, something we need in our lives. If we can discover how to get to this state of mind, it often makes the “means” of getting there (the substance or food) unnecessary.

So, EFT doesn’t make you “hate” french fries. It’s more that it can just make them irrelevant and take away the energy around them. In this way, you achieve “emotional freedom.”

Ask Zoe: Can I Forget a Painful Memory with EFT?

Here’s an interesting question from Maggie: “If I work on something with EFT, can I forget bad memories that I don’t want to remember?

I can see why, if you have a bad memory, you might think that the only way to erase the effects of the memory is to erase the memory itself. But isn’t the reality that you’d like not to be distressed by the memory anymore? I don’t think any kind of therapy or treatment or procedure (outside some kind of brain surgery) could make you forget a memory. What EFT does is take the negative charge away from a previously painful memory. That’s why it’s called Emotional Freedom Techniques—after working on something with EFT, you are free of the pain around it, you have “emotional freedom.”

To explain: when we experience a painful or scary event, it affects our energy system and thus our nervous system, and this effect stays in our nervous system and energy system as emotional stress or emotional trauma until we do something to resolve it. (For more information on how this works, see my website page on Stress and Trauma).

EFT works to heal our energy system and thus alleviates the negative charge in our nervous system. You will still remember the event itself, but it will feel a lot different. After working on bad memories with EFT Tapping, some people say they seem really far away now, or that they remember the event but there’s no feeling attached to it—it’s just matter-of-fact, like thinking about what I had for breakfast yesterday. No big deal.

And, in my opinion, one of the great things about working to heal a bad memory with EFT is that it often works so quickly (EFT Case Studies).